Speaker 1 0:02
You can have all the systems in the world, the tools, the programs, the learning, but growth stops when you stop growing. And when you reach your own personal limitations, our own internal dialogue, who we perceive ourselves to be, how we will know how well we know ourselves, and how we tune in and are skilled, we are at responding to our internal limitations and our self belief, and be the very thing that either helps or hinders our business growth. So practicing awareness around your own thoughts, learning how to take control of your own mind, and mastering the mind game of business will help to propel you to the level of success that you want. That's why the Regional Business Women's membership is more than just a source of business training, and connecting you with like minded amazing women in our community. It's also about providing you with the tools to shape a strong mindset and overcome your inner limitations to step into your potential and have the skill because it is a skill to handle adversity through the power of your mindset. today's podcast is part one of a two part podcast, where I'm going to be sharing for the first time, the masterclass content that I presented inside the membership this month. Why am I doing that? Well, because I want to give you a sample of the quality of content that I present. And also because I, I want you to be able to see that you can adopt the concepts and the ideas that I'm going to share with you here today. Because you're absolutely set your mindset up for success. Well this year, and that is my whole purpose to set you up for success. So let's go. This is the she's in business podcast, where every week, I'll explore topics and have real conversations around what it's like to run a regional business, the advantages and the unique challenges. I'm Donna Han, a seasoned regional business owner, and certified high performance business coach. I'm here to make training and professional development easily accessible for regional business women everywhere. So join me and guest experts as we share tools and insights to elevate your business, boost your mindset, and ensure that you never feel alone on this journey. No matter where you live. I'm fired up. And I'm here to educate you on what it truly takes to grow your business and your mindset beyond what you thought possible. I'm big on positivity, you know that. And I'm also here to keep a real business is hard. Life can be hard. Things don't always go to plan. But when you have a mindset toolkit that's filled with strategies and techniques and skills that actually work to get you through those tough moments. That's what can set you apart. And that's what can help you to thrive personally and professionally inside your business. We can have all the systems and processes and tools and programs and learning in the world, we can have all of that great stuff. But the growth will stop when you stop growing. And when you reach your own personal limitations. And our own internal dialogue, you know, who we perceive who we perceive ourselves to be? Oh, well, we really do know ourselves and check in with ourselves. And actually, you know, realize when we're spiraling in and we can take ourselves out of that, how we can tune in and, and the skills that we have at responding to our own internal limitations and self belief can be the very thing that either helps or hinders your business growth. And the neuroscience behind this work is absolutely fascinating. It's what led me to become a certified High Performance Coach under the guidance of Brendon Burchard. And I'm going to share some of these teachings in this two part podcast. I love his work. And part of the reason I chose to become a certified coach with Brendon Burchard is because the methodology is backed by science and research. And the incredible power and impact that mindset has on your success in all areas of your life and your business is absolutely mind blowing to me. So today I want to, I want you to really imagine put yourself in the space of imagining that you're on a zoom call with me that you're in the Regional Business Women's membership, that you're in this masterclass with me and the other amazing women in business that are there. And I'm going to provide you with a bunch of things to support you in that way. Today's masterclass is called businesses a mind game, how you can play to win, and I really want this stuff to land for you. So I've compiled a list I guess I've compiled all of the concepts and the tips that I'm going to share with you into a free download. And if you want to get it, just go to Donna han.com, forward slash 110. To get it, that's episode 110 of the podcast. So dullahan.com, forward, forward slash 110. Given that it's the start of the year, I'm gonna start with this. Don't let the past define your future. We've all had stories that we tell ourselves, we all have them. Those stories are designed to make sense of events and things that have happened, successes or obstacles, anything that we've experienced in the past, and in our lives, so far, the human brain shaped stories around those things, so that we can make sense of them. We draw conclusions and we draw meanings from those stories. And sometimes those stories can limit us and we in what we put ourselves forward for in the future, and what we believe that we can actually achieve in the future, depending upon the narrative of that story. So I want you to start to take notice of the different things you think you can do, and the different things that you think you can't do. There's a saying, whether you think you can or you can't, you're right. And this is 100%, true. Mindset, what we tell ourselves has the power to shape our future, whether you think you can or you can't, you're right. And if you can hold it in your mind, you can hold it in your hand. So the thoughts that we think are responsible for the results that we get, and this can work for us, or it can work against us. The mind is such a powerful thing. And this is why I'm so fascinated by it. So let me explain this by maybe relating it to a big goal that you have for your business, when you have a vision of a big goal, you might not always know how you going to achieve that. And that an in and of itself can be quite intimidating content. And you might even be a little afraid to set that goal to talk about it. Because you're like, Well, I don't know how I'm going to make that happen. How can I put it out there? How can I really believe that I can do that thing if I don't know how to do the thing. And it can be a huge stumbling block. So if you felt that before, maybe you're feeling it now, I want you to know that you're not alone. But what if he just started by building the picture. If we can get the picture, if we can get the vision of the end result, really allow yourself to vision, that goal, have clarity on what the end result will be, then we can work completion backwards. And we can adopt the mindset that if we can dream it, we can have it, we can get it, we can do it, we can be it. And you can take action on life is growth. And the basic law of life is either to create or to disintegrate. So you're going ahead or you're going back. And at the end of the day, the choice is yours. So my question to you is, which will it be? What are you going to choose? Another stumbling block that can that can feel that can stop you in your tracks can be that feeling that the market is flooded, that someone else is already doing it and they're crushing it? And therefore how could you possibly do it? How could I possibly do that thing. So let's say there's somebody else that's doing something and you think to yourself, well, that's great for them. But I could never achieve that. I want you to challenge your thinking and reframe your thinking that if they can do it, it's proof that it can be done. And if it can be done, you can do it too. When you're creating the vision of who you want to become in the future, or what kind of business you would like to create in the future, or what lifestyle you want to create for you and your family. When our logical brain kicks in, it can be confusing and it can be challenging because the self doubt that to tell you that you can't and come up with all the reasons why you can't. You know, and perhaps your mind is like throwing up things that you that you've never done it before. So how could you possibly do it? Or you've tried before and it failed? So why are we going to give it another go? But I want to remind you that the only person holding you back is you.
Speaker 1 9:48
So if you think to yourself or you say to yourself, I'm not confident enough to do that I could never do that. Or I'm not outspoken enough. I'm not experienced enough or I'm not skilled enough. I'm not pretty enough, I'm too old, I'm too young, I'm too fat. I don't want to do X, because who am I to put myself out there to do that and to be that it's not perfect yet. So I don't want to put it out there into the world. People won't like it, or people won't like me. But you don't need to be liked by everybody. And it actually doesn't matter whether people like you or not, that's their business, it's not yours. What I'm doing here is I'm inviting you to actually stop when those thoughts come flooding in and stop them in their tracks. When you have those thoughts, you must reject those thoughts. And you must reject anyone who influences you to think that way. And yes, it's tough, it is tough to stop yourself having those thoughts. It's a habit. It's a change process that I invite you to start working on if you're not already working on it, or if you already are, keep working on it. Because it's kind of one of those things that never ends, we have to continually keep working on our mindset. So if those thoughts come up for you, I want you to ask yourself, is it really serving you to think in that way? Do you want to bring that sentiment that thought process into the future with you? Is it serving you? And if it's not, it's about time you let it go? The other way of dealing with those thoughts when they come up, is actually ask yourself, well, how true is that? Is that actually based on truth? Or is that kind of like a story I'm making up to keep myself so? Because often when we ask ourselves, How true is that, and we actually look for the evidence to prove that thing is true. That is holding you back. Often, it's not really, it's not there. Also, is it based on something that has happened in your past that now makes no sense to be applied to where you are right now, or the situation that you're in right now. Or the situation that you want to create for your own future? Whoever you are, is whoever you want to be. And what you want, will require you to grow and shift and change and lean in in order to become the version of yourself or in order to share that your business to become the thing that you'd like it to be. And you should absolutely go for it. No one is stopping you, except you. And remember, if they can do it, you can too. So there's so much proof out there in the world. That is there for you to use as inspiration that you can do it. And remember, also, you don't have to get it right, you just have to get it started. You just have to get it going. It doesn't need to be perfect before you start. Or you promote your business and your services. Or you, you know, start working on that big goal that you have. That's a whole nother topic. And I want you to send me a DM on Instagram or, or send me an email, check the show notes for for those details. If you want me to cover that because perfectionism and fear, you know, it can be a huge blocker for a lot of people too. And I've been there. And since letting that go, my business has really changed for the better. So I'm all for sharing how I did that. If you feel like it's going to be useful for you let me know. And this leads me to sharing some lessons around having confidence or feeling like we lack the confidence to do the thing to reach for those big goals. So let me help you with this one. I want you to take courage, overconfidence, I want you to reframe it and think that you're taking steps of courage rather than needing the confidence to do it. Orange is something that we all have, right? It's actually in our DNA. It's actually a survival mechanism that we do tap into every day. We do it every day, often without realizing that we're tapping into courage. So the first time that you do anything, I want you to think about maybe the first time you took your first step. Times when you've walked into a room where you knew nobody and you started a conversation with a stranger that takes courage. Think about when you took your first driving lesson. In all of those moments. You needed to use courage to trust yourself that you can do the thing. And maybe you're doing the thing and it's not perfect the first time. I mean who gets it right and perfect the first time no one that I know. But when we are learning say for example, Drive. While learning to safely turn corners, those kinds of things, there is a judgment call that only you can make in your mind, on the timing of making that turn and on the depth perception of how sharp we need to make the turn. And, and all of that has to come together, plus, you need to have the courage to actually do it. If we didn't have the courage to do it, the car would stay stationary, you would stay stuck, you would be going nowhere. And yes, maybe it took some encouragement from your driving instructor. Maybe you had your parents sitting next to you, beside you, who was guiding you, which is all important, hence why supporting guiding, celebrating business owners to step outside their comfort zone, you know, that's, that's my, that's my jam. And that's where growth and confidence happens. But over time, the courage that initial courage that you took to get in that driving seat to you know, take the turn, over time, that turns into competence. It turns into you doing it without really thinking much of it, and that becomes confidence. But it didn't start that way did it? It wasn't that to begin with. So, again, write this stuff down or lock it into your memory bank. There's a saying from Bob Proctor, whether you think you can or you can't, you're right. And in those moments, when your mind started taking over, when you started doubting yourself, yeah, to rally up some courage. You could have allowed your mind to take over and strip back your courage and never have developed the confidence to drive or to talk to that person who maybe became the love of your life. Or to take that take your talent and turn it into your business. Instead, you took those small steps of courage you built on your knowledge you learned from others, you trusted yourself. And over time you built the confidence. And now you do it without much of a thought. Now, when you prepare to drive, you're getting your turn the key and you go. So be careful what you tell yourself. You know, just get in there and start, you don't need to feel confident right in this moment to go after those big goals. It can be easy to tap into a dash of courage, because it's in our DNA. And you know that as a fact. versus keeping yourself stuck. Because you're telling yourself you don't have the confidence to do it. You do have the confidence to do it. Because you've got the courage in your DNA. It's just building on that courage over time, and the confidence part. So I want to invite you to fear, feel the fear and do it anyway. Knowing that at every step along your business journey, there will be moments of fear, there will be there will be there. But don't let that fear stop you from taking action, put courage in the place of fear. I really, really, really want this stuff to lead for you. Because it can be game changing in the business, where it is absolutely about your mindset and the mind game over the long haul. So I want this stuff to land for you. So I've compiled all of the concepts and tips in a free download for you. And I want you to go and get it done. ahead.com forward slash 110 Get it to the episode number 110. Don't a handout comm 110 Go get it so that you have the resource there, you can come back and remind yourself of it because you will need to remind yourself of this stuff more than once.
Speaker 1 18:55
I'm jumping in here to thank you for listening to the shoes in business podcast. Each week, I watch the number of downloads rise. And I am really grateful that you choose to have me in your ears supporting you and your business. And I really, really appreciate it when you take the time to leave a review of the podcast. So to thank you for taking the time to review the podcast I have got a special gift for you a productivity notepad designed by me that I will personally pop in the mail to you. I'm going old school. This is not a digital download. This will physically arrive in your mailbox. I've crafted this to help you optimize your focus and maximize your productivity and I personally use it every day. I've also gifted it to my clients and it's been a real game changer for them as well. So here's the steps. Step one, review the podcast on whatever platform you listen to it on and then snap a screenshot of your review. Step two and this is an important step if you want me to send you a productivity notepad I want you to DM me on Instagram, type the word review. And you'll get a link to a form that provides me with your postal address. And voila, that is it my friend, I will personally make sure that a productivity notepad goes in the mail for you as a special thank you for taking the time to review the podcast. Okay, I'm back. And I hope you're still with me. If you are multitasking, I want you to bring your focus back, because you're gonna want to hear this. And on that note, if you are multitasking, I do really want this stuff to land for you. Because I know that you might not be able to take notes while you're driving. Or maybe you're walking. So as I mentioned before, the tips are there for you compiled into a free download. The link is in the show notes. But if you go to John Hancock comm forward slash, one 110 Sorry, 110, which is episode 110, you can get it there. So my next gold nugget for you is to ask the right questions. Our mind is super powerful. But solid questions, questions have the potential to open up possibilities, they also have the potential to hold us back from taking big steps forward. So the questions that we ask ourselves are shaping the kinds of answers that create either negative or positive self talk and thoughts. So what if you started to pay attention to the questions or the statements that you say to yourself, and you're not crazy? By the way, if you do talk to yourself either out loud or inside your head? We all do it? We all do it? So what if you ask different questions? What if the types of questions you asked led you to more positive thoughts? Instead of statements like I don't know how to do this, therefore, I'm not going to even give it a go. Add a dash of curiosity to that, and ask yourself, how could I do this? What would it look like? If I did? What would the first step be? What would the next step be? If something isn't working the way you thought it would? Which happens all the time? Right? Ask how could I do this differently? Who can I speak to? Who could I model from? What have I done before that did work well that I could adapt to this thing that I'm doing. Let's say you have a light bulb moment, you know, a big idea, a really big idea. And then the fear comes in that oh yeah, that's great. But the buts right. The imposter syndrome starts nipping at you, the procrastination starts to show up and slow you down. All the reasons why you shouldn't take action start flooding in. That, my friend is fear speaking to you. fear keeps us safe. It's actually not a negative emotion, though, it's actually a great emotion. If you reframe the sensation of fear. It's actually one of the things that you can use as a key to removing massive roadblocks that keep you stuck. Fear can actually work for you. I want you to reframe fear to be an indication that you just care that you really care about the outcome. And then that's all that is. Fear is the precursor to growth. So let's make fear work for us, not against us. We can't remove the fear. It's in our DNA, it's a survival mechanism that we need to stay safe. So we don't want to remove it, we need it. But instead, in non life threatening situations we can use Vienna, Paris on. So I want you to think about what's one thing what's a goal that you have 12 over the next 12 months that has evoked some fear inside of you. Or maybe it's something that you've been avoiding, or you know, you're potentially going to avoid something that you feel stuck on. I want you to have that thing in your mind. Even better put pen to paper on this, I'm gonna walk you through a four step process to get you unstuck and into action mode. And this process was inspired by Tim Ferriss with a bit of a tweak. So we spend time and energy planning the growth of our business, we also need to spend time and energy on getting into action mode and removing the things that are going to impact on us taking action. So let's start by asking the right questions. The first one is in relation to that big goal that you have or the thing that you're feeling stuck on or you know something that you know that you're potentially going to avoid because of fear. Ask yourself what's the worst that could happen. What's the worst that could happen? If if it did, if it came to fruition? If your worst fears came to fruition? What's the worst that would happen? Why this is important is because it gives it allows you to give some space to your fear. Avoiding it is not the answer, your brain will go to the worst place anyway. So let's invite it to go there. And when we are in a calm and logical state, and we go there, as opposed to, you know, allowing the anxiety to overtake us, when we're in a calm, logical state, and we do this process, it allows us to be responsive versus being reactive. And, you know, sometimes this is the only question that you need to ask, what's the worst that can happen to realize that the worst thing isn't actually that bad. And in that moment, you've removed that roadblock that was holding you stuck. Other times, you'll need to keep moving through this process. If you are, you know, removing an offer from your business or replacing it with something new. If you've, you know, potentially going to maybe lose some income. Yes, you need to step through this process to know how you recover if the worst thing was to happen. If your answer to what's the worst thing that could happen, is that I fail. Ask the question again, go deeper with that. What's the worst thing about failing? Because just answering with a fail is not going to really give you any further insight for you to be able to work through that block. The second question is, what can you do to prevent the worst thing from happening? What can you do to prevent the worst thing from happening and the reason why this is important, is it gives your brain a to do list actionable tasks that will help you to overcome the fear. And our brain loves at least right, it loves to know what to do next, you can't control what people are going to think of you. So there's no point in putting energy into that. Instead, I want you to invest your energy in working on your mindset to accept that you can't make everybody happy. And that their thoughts are not your responsibility to harm. If you some of this, some of the fear coming up for you is that it's got to do with your skills, then you know what the thing that can prevent the worst thing from happening is practicing your skills, getting better at the learning more, you know, improving your skills and knowledge. But don't let that become the excuse that then leads to procrastination, right. Sometimes it can be oh, well, I can't do the thing. Because now I know I need to learn more. And therefore I'm going to go and find all of the things that I need to learn. And that's going to take me another 12 months, and yada yada yada yada, it becomes procrastination. So you remember that you don't have to get it right, you just have to get it started. So just use it as stepping stones for progress. Even if you start and you make a few mistakes, it's going to be okay. If you do have a habit of procrastination, get someone to hold you accountable. If you know that you need some extra emotional support, if this is a really big stretch for you if you're really going beyond your comfort zone. And you know that you need some extra emotional support because it is emotional, that ask for it. Ask someone to be that emotional support for you. And we do that for each other all the time inside the regional business, women's membership. So number three is what can you do if the worst actually happens?
Speaker 1 28:55
If the worst actually happens, what are you going to do about it? Why this gives you a backup plan?
Unknown Speaker 29:01
Why this is important, I should say is because it gives you the backup plan.
Speaker 1 29:07
If the worst happens, you're still going to be okay. You're going to survive. It's going to be all right. How are you going to flip it around? Flip the script and reframe the failure to be okay,
Unknown Speaker 29:21
I know I'm gonna need to process the emotions of money, pity party, I'm gonna move through it. And then what are the steps
Speaker 1 29:27
that you are going to do to own that moment and make it work for you focus on what's within your control, you're going to control the controllables in those moments, if the worst actually happens, it's like giving yourself that backup panic plan an insurance policy to know what you're going to do. It will give you that I don't know almost like that confidence to go you know what if if the shit hits the fan, I still gonna be okay because I know what I would do in that situation. The fourth part of this is to ask yourself, What's the best that could happen? How much out of 10? Do you actually want that to happen? And why this part is important is because it brings in the positive. Even if the worst happened, what good stuff would come of that? What if you didn't fail, though? What if it wasn't a raging success? What would be the best that could happen? Because sometimes, the worst that could happen is that the best doesn't happen. That you don't give it a go. And you risk never knowing what the best could have been like for you, and your business and your lifestyle. So after doing that process, how do you feel about the fear now?
Unknown Speaker 30:53
Is it still going to stop you? Are you gonna get out there and do it? I hope so. So I'm going to wrap up part one of his podcasts now and finish by inviting you to be intentional with your thoughts,
Speaker 1 31:06
to pay more attention to your internal dialogue and to catch yourself. When those negative thoughts come up. Take control of your own mind and begin to master the mind game of business. It will help you to propel to the level of success that you want. And it is a practice. Over time, like building a muscle in our body. We're building strength and health in our mindset. And that's why I do the work I do as a one on one business and mindset coach in inside the Regional Business Women's membership, it's more than just a source of business training. It's more than just a source of connecting you to other amazing women in our community. It's also providing you with the tools to shape a strong mindset and overcome your own inner limitations to step into your potential to have the skill because it is a skill to handle adversity when it comes up. You've got this, you know you do. Just turning up and listening to this point in the show shows you that you value your mindset and your business. So let's get your mindset into a place where you chase after your goals with determination and unwavering self belief. And I've got you covered with that free download. Go to done ahead.com forward slash 110 to get it and I will see you back here next week for part two. Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of the shoes in business podcast. Make sure you hit follow so that you are the first to know as soon as a new episode drops. And if you really want to deliver me smiles send me a DM find me on Instagram at Donna Han underscore coach and tell me what you loved most about this episode. Also, feel free to let me know what topics you need to learn more about if you are regional businesswoman ready to rise and soar towards success. I'll see you back here next week for another episode.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
